We all experience change whether we want to or not. Regardless of our age or life experience, change is difficult. It’s not that we don’t like change or want it, it’s that we would prefer for it to happen more easily and on our terms.
It’s a simple fact that we want the things in our lives to remain familiar and stable. We strive to create routine in our lives, and make our world as predictable as possible. Routine and predictability make us feel safe, secure and in control.
If we want to thrive in the midst of change we cannot hurry through the change we are experiencing and ignore our internal needs.
Change is an event. It is when something happens—an acquisition, a bankruptcy, a death, a birth, a new employee, a new boss, a new job, a move, etc. Change is essentially something external. We all can relate to hearing people refer to change as something that has happened to them. It is physical. We can typically see it or touch it.
Change may happen suddenly on the surface, but the process of moving through change is called ‘transition.’ This is what happens to us internally. The event of external change inevitably brings about the experience of internal transition. Transition, unlike change, is an experience, not an event. This internal transition is a natural process of disorientation and reorientation that feels uncomfortable, but leads to growth.
Change is both an external event and an internal response. We must recognize that the internal transition usually doesn’t match the speed of the external change that has occurred. Therefore, for a healthy and productive change, we need to allow our internal response to catch up with the external change.
Here are a few tips to help you find comfort and some semblance of control the next time you are in the transition phase of change:
- Do something that makes you feel in control. Choose a project that you can accomplish. Stick to it until you finish.
- Choose one or two areas of your life that you can focus on to impact your future success.
- Think bigger and see yourself successful. Use your visualization skills to see your best outcome.
- Accept that this is an awkward stage. Give yourself grace and ask for patience from others in your life.
The transition phase of change can be difficult to navigate, but applying these few simple tips will help you to feel less vulnerable and uncertain, and more empowered and in control.